Naughty pappu non veg jokes

Pappu Aur Paheli – new non veg jokes

(Non veg jokes in hindi) Ek School Mein Madam Ne Bachchon Se Kaha: Aaj Kuch Mazedaar Paheliyan Puchti Hun, Jara Sochkar Jawab Dena.

Bachche: Ji Madam.

Madam: Aisa Kaun Sa Paan Hai Jisko Khaya Nahin Jaa Sakta?

Saaal Sunte Hi Pappu Zor-Zor Se Hasne Laga… Yahan Tak Ki Haste Haste Neeche Bhi Gir Gaya.

Madam: Kya Hua Pappu? Itni Hasi Kyun Aa Rahi Hai??

Pappu: Kya Madam, Aap Bhi Na Kaise Kaise Sawaaal Karti Hain? Iska Jawab Hai “Stanpaan”.

Madam: Nalayak, Gadhe… Iska Jawaab Hai Japan… Jab Dekho Ulti-Seedhi Baatein Sochte Rehte Ho, Nikal Jao Meri Class Se….

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Naughty Pappu jokes

Pappu Phone Pe: Ye Kaha Ka Number Hai ?

Constable: Police Station.

Pappu: Haath Mein Kya Hai?

Constable: Danda Hai, Kyun?

Pappu: Apne Peeche Le Lo Isko…

Ye Keh Ke Pappu Ne Phone Kaat Diya. Constable Ne Number Nikaal Ke Usi Number Pe Phone Kia Toh Pappu Ki Maa Ne Phone Uthaya.

Constable: Yaha Se Kisi Bachche Ne Phone Kiya Aur Kaha Ke Danda Apne Pichwaade Mein Daal Lo.

Maa: Kitni Der Pehle?

Constable: 10 Minute Huye.

Maa: Ohh… Sorry… Kaafi Der Ho Gayi, Nikaal Lo… Aap Bhi Kahan Bachche Ki Baaton Mein Aa Gaye… ??????

Naughty Pappu
Pappu Phone Pe: Ye Kaha Ka Number Hai ?

Constable: Police Station.

Pappu: Haath Mein Kya Hai?

Constable: Danda Hai, Kyun?

Pappu: Apne Peeche Le Lo Isko…

Ye Keh Ke Pappu Ne Phone Kaat Diya. Constable Ne Number Nikaal Ke Usi Number Pe Phone Kia Toh Pappu Ki Maa Ne Phone Uthaya.

Constable: Yaha Se Kisi Bachche Ne Phone Kiya Aur Kaha Ke Danda Apne Pichwaade Mein Daal Lo.

Maa: Kitni Der Pehle?

Constable: 10 Minute Huye.

Maa: Ohh… Sorry… Kaafi Der Ho Gayi, Nikaal Lo… Aap Bhi Kahan Bachche Ki Baaton Mein Aa Gaye… ??????

Pappu: Bhaisaab Ek Condom Dena. Maine Girl Friend Ko Gift Dena Hai.
Dukandar: Is Par Cover Chada Dun Kya?
Santa: Arre Nahin Bhai, Ye Cover Hi Hai, Gift Toh Mere Paas Hai.

A girl was handling Pappu,s coc.k for the first time.
After some time few drops came out, she Asked, Ye Kya Hai Pappu???
Pappu: Kuch Nahin, Khushi Ke Aansoo hain…

Hindi Di Punjabi…
Hindi: Aur Kaise Ho Aap?
Punjabi: Hor Fudi Diya Kidaan?

Hindi: Maine Aapse Kuch Nahi Kaha.
Punjabi: Main Kehra Teri Bund Maar Layi?

Hindi: Main Abhi Aapko Theek Karta Hoon.
Punjabi: Main Huney Teri Bhain Di Lun Dinda.

Hindi: Yeh Sab Kisne Kiya?
Punjabi: Aah Kehne Bhain Chudayi Apni ?

Hindi: Main Aapko Pasand Nahi Karta.
Punjabi: Main Teri Bund Ni Maarda.

Hindi: Aap Mein Risk Laine Ki Himmat Nahi Hai.
Punjabi: Tere Tattya Ch Dum Haini !!!

Hindi: Aap Ne Jo Krna Hai Kar Lena.
Punjabi: Tu Patt Layi Jehra Lun Puttna.

Hindi: Uski Baat Na Karo.
Punjabi: Bund Maar Ohdi.

Hindi: Aap Ne Mauka Gawa Diya Hai.
Punjabi: Lun Farh La Hun…

Orange Slices
Ek Baar Santa Ka Dost Jaspal USA Se Santa Ki Poori Family Ke Liye Kapde Gift Leke Aata Hai. Sare Kapde “Lee” Brand Ke The. USA Wala Dost Sante Ko Kapde Dene Lagta Hai Aur Kehne Lagta Hai:
Yeh Teri Baap Ki Lee
Yeh Tere Maa Ki Lee
Yeh Tere Behan Ki Lee
Yeh Tere Bhai Ki Lee
Yeh Tere Bhabhi Ki Lee

Sante Yeh Sun Ke Gussa Ho Jaata Hai, Usko Lagta Ki Jaspal ske Parivar Ki Beizzati Kar Raha Hai. Santa Kitchen Mein Jaake Ek Santra “Orange” Le Aata Hai Aur Chhil Ke Dost Ko Deta Hai Aur Kehne Lagta Hai:
Aah Tere Pioo De Faadi “Slice”
Aah Teri Maa De Faadi
Aah Teri Behan De Faadi
Aah Tere Bhra De Faadi
Aah Teri Bhaabhi De Faadi
Aah Teri Gharwali De Faadi




Sweets and Celebrations
Shadi Hui, Khub Mithaai Bati;
Pehla Bachcha Hua, Khub Mithaai Bati;
Dusra Bachcha Hua, Phir Mithai Bati;
5 Saal Baad, Bachchon Ka School Admission Karwane Gaya, Donation 2 Lac+ Fees 1,50,000;
Aadmi Ghar Aakar Khub Roya Toh Biwi Boli: Janu Meri Phati Toh Khub Mithaai Baati, Khud Ki Phati Toh Rona Aa Gaya???

Farak Toh Padta Hai

Teacher Se.x Education Ke Period Mein Bachho Ko Samjha Rahi Thia.

Teacher: Se.x Ke Time Condom Use Karne Se Safety Bhi Rahti Hai Aur Enjoyment Mein Fark Nahi Padta.

Ek Ladki Jisne Pehle Se.x Kiya Hua Tha, Ye Sun Kar Boli.

Mam, Polythene Mein Rasgulla Daal Ke Chooso, Pata Chal Jayega Ki Farak Padta Hai Ya Nahi?

Indian Wife
A Negro wanted to go to a fancy dress party. He told his Indian wife to get a costume. Wife gets a snowman suit.

Negro: WTF!!! You bloody Indian… have you seen a black snowman! Get me another one.

She gets a Santa suit.

Negro: WTF!!! You bloody Indian! Have you ever seen a black Santa! Get another suit!

Wife, gets pissed and brings a bamboo stick.

Negro: What am I to do with this?

Wife: Gaand Mein Daal Aur Chocobar Banja BHENCHOD!!

My First Time…



Do Ladkiyaan Aapas Mein Ek-Dusre Se Baatein Kar Rahi Thi.

Pehli: Kal Mera First Time Tha.

Dusri: Oh Really, Kya Hua?

Pehli: Shuru Mein Dheere-Dheere Andar Liya Aur Dheere Se Bahar Nikaala.

Dusri: Dheere Se Kyun?

Pehli: Unhone Bataya Tha, Pehle Dheere-Dheere Karna Hai.

Dusri: Theek Hai, Phir? Pahli: Pehle 10 Minute Tak Aise Hi Kiya, Badi Mushkil Hui Kaabu Karne Mein.

Dusri: Uske Baad Kya Hua?

Pahli: Phir Thoda Teji Se Liya, Phir Aur Tej… Phir Aur Tez.

Dusri: Hmmmmmm Phir, Pihir Kya Hua?

Pehli: Phir Jhatke Se Andar Leti Gayi, Aur Jhatke Se Bahar Nikaalti Gayi.

Dusri: Oh My God.

Pehli: Saare Room Mein Aawaaz Goonjne Lagi, Kaafi Der Tak Kiya, Teji Se Lete Aur Bahar Nikaalte Hue Dard Bhi Shuru Ho Gaya Tha.

Dusri: Aage Bataaaa, Phir Kya Hua.

Pehli: Bas Yaar Mere Yoga Teacher Ne Kaha Aise Hi Pranayaam Mein Apne Saans Ko Kaabu Karo, Anand Aayega.

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Best WhatsApp status ever in hindi

WhatsApp attitude status and shayari


Some Quick Naughty Stuff – jokes

  • Wife: Jaanu, Aaj Sex Ho Jaye.
  • Husband: Aaj Nahi.
  • Wife: Kyun?
  • Husband: Aaj Condom Laana Bhul Gaya.
  • Wife: Teri Toh Roz Ki magaj Maari Hai… Lamination Karva Le!

Ek Husband Sex Ke Baad Wife Ki Wife Ki BRA Dete Hue: Yeh Lo Apne Doodh k Dhakkan…
Unsatisfied Wife, Gusse Se, Underwear Dete Hue: “Ye Lo Apne Murday ka Kafan…”

Suhaagrat Ki Raat Ko Dulha Apni Nayi Naveli Dulhan Se Puchhta Hai: Sach-Sach Bata Kabhi Kiya Hai Ki Nahi?
Dulhan: Nahi Jaanu, Kabhi Kiya Nahi, Bas Hamesha Karwaya Hai.

Height of Job satisfaction.
Stud gets a job in girls hostel…
After 2 months the owner asked: Arey Bhai, Tum Apni Salary Lene Kyun Nahin Aaye?

Stud, Badi Hairaani Se: KYA..!!!? Salary Bhi Milegi…!

Santa was looking at name plate of an air hostess above her left breast: KOMAL !
With lots of confusion he asked: Doosra Waala KADAK Hai Kya?

Short but Hilarious

  1. Friend 1: Kal Meri Girlfriend Ka Birthday Hai, Uske Haath Main Kya Gift Dun?
  2. Friend 2: Apna De De!!!
  3. Friend 1: Mazaak Mat Kar Yaar, Koi Badi Cheez Bata.
  4. Friend 2: Toh Mera De De!!!

Bas Mein Bethi Ek Ladki Ki T-Shirt Pe Car Bani Hui Thi. Uske Saath Chota Bachha Baitha Use Dekh Raha Tha.
Ladki Bachche Ko Dekhte Hue Muskura Ke Boli: Car Chalani Hai Kya?
Bachcha: Nahi Car Toh Nahi Chalani, Par Agar Aap Ki Ijazat Ho Toh Horn Baja Loon?

new naughty non veg jokes

Question: Which Is The Only Hindi Measurement Unit That Describes Time, Length, Weight, Heat, Light, Power, Noise Etc. Everything At Minimum Value?
Answer: Jhaant Barabar!!!

Question: Who Sang This Song?
Main Pal Do Pal Ka Shayar Hoon, Pal Do Pal Meri Jawani Hai, Pal Do Pal Meri Masti Hai, Pal Do Pal Kahani Hai.
Answer: An Erect Peniis.

Tailor Ladki Ka Maap Lete Hue: Tumhaara Koi Boyfriend hai ?
Girl: Haan Ji Hai, Lekin Kyun ???
Tailor: Usse Bolna Thode Din Left Side Pe Zyaada Dhyaan De, Fitting Sahi Baithegi.

naughty-pappu-non-veg-jokes

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